Concerned about the global shortage of fresh metaphors and irony, I was relieved to get an email from Facebook informing me I might be eligible for economic assistance from the SBA as the manager of The Poet’s Garage, my upcoming poetry collection. Just in time for its launch from Unsolicited Press.
More importantly, I hope the government will open its vast emergency stockpile of rhetorical and stylistic devices. Ever wonder why you never find synecdoches or charactonymns in the wild anymore?
But before you go searching on your own, practice good hygiene and immunize yourself against clichés by reading a poetry book. This is the best way to protect yourself and support literary recovery.